3/31/2005 And The Regular Routine... Suddenly... Disrupted... Did ya ever have one of those days that totally disrupts your regular routine and then continues to disrupt for a few days to a point where your disrupted days become your routine... //eyes looks up to the right hand corner// ... yeah... I think mine started today... I can't explain it ... but I think I will be able to trace the shift of chaos/craraziotica/confusion/creativity/charisma/chi to today... I may have just caught it on the cusp of a changeover which has never been accomplished outside of the lab... ... maybe it was due to sleeping really late this morning/afternoon... maybe it was a new perspective on life/love/liquidmedication... everyone I spoke to today did not sound the same/say what they normally say/do... I did not eat all day but I was never hungry... I got home super late and still had a lot to do and chose to do none of them... maybe it was the arrival of my new kewl cell phone... uggh... wheee... it's like being on a rolla coaster with the one loose wheel being under your seat... very Lord of the Flies... very 7even... weird... meh... we will see what developes... It was kinda cold crappy today anyway... ...but I did witness some weird things today... Beckwannabe came into 7-11 wearing a blue-pin-striped-suit while branding a big red star on his olive-T with his Ringo mop top and red converse hi-tops... if i had my camera I would have totally snapped one b/c it was where opportunity met attention... he prolly would have been totally fine with the fact that his pic was up on the innernext and never even told about it... or even better... the fact that his appearance was just remembered as a vacant memory... but a memory nontheless.... clever... the junior high was just next door... I give the kid props... madcrazy is always kewl! Then... at the same 7'evs... I saw 'Cruella de Vil' pumping her own gas... with the gas pump on one side and her gas tank waaaay on the other side of her car... and didn't she just drag that gas hose over the trunk to the other side of her car n' start fuelin'... in her long fur coat and her high heals and her 80's frosted hair helmut... good for you... good for you for pumping your own gas no matter how shortbus it seemed... it does not matter that the other seven pumps were so totally empty... I give 'Cruella' props... richcrazy is always kewl! In a word... marchwasathrill... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/31/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/30/2005 Busy Cops, Speeding Hearses, A Green Mini Coupe and The Highway Gallery ...it seems like years since it's been clear... here comes the sun... and I say... it's all right... Wholly cow... what a sight for sore eyes... When I woke up at 11 am (yeah... I am still a rock star) and saw the warm yellow sun and the bright blue sky... finally....the worst is over... Although it was not on the same level of this, at this point, I'll take what I can get... While driving today I passed a cop who had already pulled over someone and just finished giving them them a ticket... and then decided to follow me and follow me and follow me... and then pass me... and then I watched in drooling anticipation as the cop slowly searched out his next victim... waiting... waiting... waiting... da-dum... da-dum... da-dum... the suspense was killing me... I could barely see him in the distance when... 'Target Acquired! Target Acquired!'... he super sped up pouncing on his next victim who never even saw it coming... when I passed him with his lights aflashing on the side of the road, his 'closer to the quota' victim was still not realizing what just happened... can we say it all together now... 'End Of The Month' Then I saw a Green Mini Coupe with the licence plate that said 'VERYEURO'... and the driver was... well... 'VERYDORKY'... There was hardly anyone on the roads... it was like luxury lanes... so I decided to take some pics... totally... and finally with my wellwornwinter jacket off... all the windows rolled down... listening to 'Club Foot' by Kasabian on my Pod... ahhh.... And then suddenly out of the blue I see this strange black car in my rearview mirror with like a taller than average oddly shaped roof barreling down right on top of me and then quickly passes me... I was doing like about 60-65 so he was really traveling... and I am so ready to look over and see some punk kid with a pimped out whip... so when I turn to give him a very disapproving head shake... I realised that it was not a pimped out whip... it was a speeding hearse... totally dashing by me... and yes... they were transporting a client.... and then the limo superdashes by... and then they cut me off... I was so totally startled... I had never seen anything like it before... but I managed to take a pic as they sped away at warp speed... In a word... niceweatherbringoutthefreaks... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/30/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/29/2005 Rain... Rain... Go To Spain... Never show your face again! Ughh... Now I know why Seattle has a high suicide rate... it's only been two days but it might as well be like two weeks... grrrr... Uggh! Thank goodness I downloaded the new TRUSTcompany and the new Theory Of A Deadman to convince me to take the stairs instead of the window... In a word... newmusictuesdayssavedmyblog... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/29/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/28/2005 Rainy Days And Mondays Always Get Me Down... And after yesterday's awesome high... this day sucks like fifty different ways and none of them in the good way! I guess I'm just talking to myself and feeling old, sometimes I'd like to quit... I think nothing ever seems to fit... I'm just hangin' around, nothing to do but frown... Rainy days and mondays always get me down... In a word... damperthandamp.... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/28/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/27/2005 So Totally... ...And so the perfect image meets it's perfect day... In a word... enjoiEastereverybody... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/27/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/26/2005 The Toughts And Ponderances of The Leafless Sunlit Tree... Spring is not the best of seasons. Cold and flu are two good reasons; Wind and rain and other sorrow, Warm today and cold tomorrow. Whoever said Spring was romantic? The word that best applies is frantic! ::Author:: Source Unknown //If ya know the Author please let me know so I can give the peep some props.// In a word... juztapositionisfun... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/26/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/25/2005 iWish... And If Wishes Were Fishes The World Would Be An Ocean... Oh I wished and I so wished that this was true... But turns out it was created by this uber super excellent talented dude... Talk about your screaching halt and your eert-block.. To top it all off ... a full moon tonite as well... cah-razy In a word... iWish... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/25/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/24/2005 Just When I Thought That I Was Out... They Pull Me Back In... Uggh... Didn't I just declare the End Of The Snow ... Ah well... no sooner did I open up my Extreme Makeover:Pie Hole Edition when it started to flurry and rain and sleet yesterday... but it did not think it would accumulate to anything... ...and then today I woke up at like 11 a.m. (yeah... I am a rock star) and this is what is saw... (and yes... I still have a wreath on the front of my car... it is held on by Bakery String (red 'n white n' red 'n white)... I did not think it would last 3 minutes let alone three months... I consider it my own little Mythbuster Project...) (that lil' tab says 'Geraniums'.. and I am sure it says nothing about 'getting full sun and thrives when frozen') Is it weird that I did not speak to one single human being face to face today... all day... eventhough I even went outdoors... to shovel for like 30 minutes... is it really kool or really freaky... wellanyway at least iHad mY bUddy iPod... now is that really kool or really freaky... In a word... whenwillspringspring... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/24/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/22/2005 Prepare... To Be... Ah-Letter-Fied! Dude... This is like Eight Different Kinds of Kewl... Prepare... to be ah-letter-fied! ...stand back, please... I said STAND BACK!!! And if these peeps could talk to the Wheel of Fortune peeps... hades... even I would watch... Thanks Davezilla! //And in other newz// And so... I declare... endly c-yah-laterly totally and finally... the snow/youweretoocoldanyway/ has ended... (Sod Farms are like really big... right?!?... I know!) In a word... idliketobuyavowel... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/22/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/21/2005 The Saddest Playground Vs. The Five Dollar Inspiroti... Uggh... No sooner did I quick see and then drive past and then back up to and then take a pic of what I see as 'The Saddest Playground Ever'... crammed between two houses where a house should be.... where every house had a backyard with their own playground... on a street where no park was needed... lonely and forgotten...... run down... untaken care of... dis-repair... unplayed... there were even buckets and plastic shovels and toys on the picnic table and on the ground that were prolly there before it first began to snow... months ago... years ago... and the name... the name of the park... Grimes Park... Talk about sad... and so unrelated... when I got home and emptied my pockets and I found this Five Dollar Bill and written in red ink it said... Uggh Uhgain...... So I am totally toying with the idea of attaching it to the 'park' sign and see what happens... I'll keep ya posted... P.S. If it was a sunny day... would this would be a totally different post altogether...? In a word... fivedollarinspiroti... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/21/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/20/2005 Beyond The Leafless Trees... Look beyond the snow... Beyond the leafless trees... Thru the valley ... And over the mountain tops... Where /insert wish/ will be... (I was upstate this weekend... and man... they still gots like a ton of snow... still!) In a word ... boundlessgroovyness..... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/20/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/19/2005 The Bridges Of 'Fill In Whateva' County... Call me crazy but there is something about going over bridges that is pretty kewl... In a word...kinetic... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/19/2005 2 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/18/2005 It's War of the Worlds....And Run......Run As Fast As You Can! Is anyone else as scared of the trailers to War of the Worlds as I am... everysingletime I watch one I want to call someone I know to tell them that I am o.k. and so.... I just watched the new Teaser Trailer #2 and then... then I called my mom... totally true story... And in other news... Eventhough spring is the day after tomorrow... ...it still... it still remains... this pile of snow is from a parking lot strip mall where ya can't even see the stores... will it... will it ever end... In a word... runasfastasyoucan.... //The Narrator says "It's called a 'changeover'... the movie goes on... and nobody in the audience has any idea...."// ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/18/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/17/2005 Holy Happy One Crazy Yikes Year 'Versary!!! So Totally... Dudes/Dudettes... I did not think I would do this past one week let alone one year.... So tanks 4 readin'... But just like real life... you must pass an exam/test/challenge to get to the next level/grade/tribal council... //enters Fear Factor/Mission Impossible music// And so... below are Twelve Questions... The answers appear within 'The Ark' of the posts of this past year ... Your mission... if you choose to accept it... is to remember/find all the answers... Good Luck! This entry will self destruct in 5 seconds... so read really quicklike! GO! 1. What are the names of my two pet spiders? 2. What is meant by 'Selling Popcorn"? 3. Who could have been 'super great'? 4. When did I pray that a rock group's tour bus would have been stuck and then decide to play a free concert...? 5. What is 'migration'? 6. What was the only image to be viewed... without a click... in the past year? 7. What was 'Satan's Calling Card'? 8. Who is 'Ms. Molly Funk'? 9. Who is the 'Patron Saint of the Invincible...'? 10. What is the correct answer ? a. lazy b. hungover c. doll parts d. all of the above 11. What is 'A Super Bubba'? 12. What happens when I hear music? ::Extra Credit:: What is the 'X' word when you... Replace any word that begins with an 'X' with your significants name and it will be all righteous!...? Whew!... I hope it was easy... and really... thanks ;-) And totally of course... Happy Patty's Day!!! AND WAY TOO MUCH CABBAGE THIS YEAR... whoa....yippie!! May the luck of the Irish Lead to happiest heights And the highway you travel Be lined with green lights. Bring in the bottled lightning, a clean tumbler, and a corkscrew. Charles Dickens ...and this next year.... it is gonna so rule! In a word... yeah... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/17/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/16/2005 New Nine Inch Nails Vs. New Dave Matthews... Let's Get Ready To Rumbaaaal!!! Holy Excellent 15 Minutes Of Awesomeness, Batman... ...And like within like ah 15 minute span I hear the new NIN track 'The Hand That Feeds' and then I hear the new Dave Matthews track 'Baby' ... I was so guffawed that I am still not able to from an up onion %-)...gerrr... Danger!! Danger!! /Not Harvey/ Paranoia! Paranoia! //Slaps self in face// Whoa ... so yeah... so me and my iPod /1st Generation/ drove under some of those really strong hi-tension power lines that totally disrupted the signal of my iTrip... so I turned on the radio/radioyousuckanyway/ ...suddenly... an answer was presented to me... and it was the question that drove me... you know the question... just as I did... What happens when opportunity minus chance times hope plus destiny equals a wish that your heart makes...??? //enters sultry thunderous echoy voice// ...ahhhhhh... now I know... //exits voice// Thanx K-Rock... no... U-Rock! I will discuss the tunez after I have worn them awhile and break them in... first impressions are so over rated... Psssst:: The New NIN video is pretty kool... just kick on the agitated blue abstract... takes a while to load but totally worth it... In a word... phinallysumnuetunez... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/16/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/15/2005 Bye Bye Real World :: Philly Eh.....Vanilla... And eventhough Real World::Philly... officially ended last week, tonite they had like the things you didn't see or know about, etc... having said that... I thought the final episode last week was a little weak... and the recap tonite was a little sad... MJ and Landon don't even see each other, they were the best of buds... but I guess I was a little sad to see them all go... but hardly anyone of them cried ;-( I always like when something went on... but was never revealed ... Karamo n' Willie... no surprise there... really... ...a sensual ma-soge... It really did seem to go by a little too fast... they even had a 3 week bye-aitus in December... But ahhh... who can forget Figi! Even Jon Bonjovi was on the show... and I think...yeah... I think that is about it... Everyone was kool enough but overall it was kinda vanilla... But good times... good times... I can't believe San Diego ended so long ago... This is the true story Of seven strangers, Picked to live in a house To find out what happens when people stop being polite And start getting real. The Real World... //all together now//...Philadelphia... L8R Mel L8R Landon L8R Karamo L8R MJ L8R Willie L8R Shavonda C-Ya Sarah Now what... what am I gonna do with my Tuesday Nights.... What?... What's that? Uggh... PoweR Girls is on next... and NO... I will not watch it! Well... Yeah... I kinda did... Good ole Lizzie G. ...run over some peeps get your own show.... Hurrah!!! And yes... the Real World will be around for at least another 5 years and at least two more Battle of the Sexes... Hooray!!! In a word... austintexasbaby... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/15/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/14/2005 Kasabian So Rules......This Is The Movement... Yeah so like a few weeks ago iTunes had one of those free song download for a song called "Club Foot" from the band Kasabian .. . And I totallyloved it... So now I just downloaded the whole album cleverly entitled Kasabian and I have listen to it like five or six times... the whole way thru... and dude... it is like equal parts summer bar-b-que plus late night drinks at the lounge plus awesome windows-rolled-down-sun-in-face-roadtrip all rolled into one!!! I Love It!... I think they are from Germany and the web site is a littly funky... but kool nonetheless ::Travel Hint:: So when ya get to the website just keep clicking on anything red...trust me ;-) ...This Is The Movement... In a word... blackrebelmotorcycleclub... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/14/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/13/2005 What If... Nothing Was Ever Forgotten... What If... Nothing Was Ever Lost...? Man... That commercial for Ebay always give me the willies... I don't know if it is the music or the images or the tag line at the end or what but... jillies and willies... I love it.... and it is called... The Lost Boat.... Willies! Thanx guys for helping me find it! In a word... hopeful... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/13/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/12/2005 SpongeBob Squarepants... The Effin Movie Whoa! I won't say anything about the SpongeBob Squarepants:The Movie except to say that we watched the DVD tonight and that about half way thru the movie I took a drink order and no one wanted anything but I wanted a 'soda' so I ran to get the 'soda' and then I dashed back to my seat... Whew! What!?! ....I thunked and I thunked and then I said out loud "Did I really just run to get a 'soda' and then rush back so I would not miss anything...?" I got a collective "Yes..." And that is all I will say... In a word... bikinibottoms... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/12/2005 2 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/11/2005 New Audioslave Album... I KNOW... I heard the new tune today... yeah... on the radio/radioyousuckanyway/... It is called 'Be Yourself'... and it sounds... if I may ...a little U2ish(in a good way but weird for Cornell)... and it even sounded kinda like an old song ya forgot about but liked... so I listen to it and I did not change the station, which I will almost always do on the rare occasion that I even listen to the radio/radioyousuckanyway/ since I embraced the Pod... and the tune got to me and I... I even jimmy j'd thru the whole thing... so I guess it is kinda kewl... I knew it! Groovysmack! ...uggh... now? yes. Do I have to say it? say it... Do I? yes... Really?!? just say it... I am... I am a slave... a slave to audioslave! Wow... that felt... kinda really good... like dirtygood... Wohoo! In a word.. listen... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/11/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/10/2005 The Trailer Dropped Today... And if you know what that means... Then that means that you saw what I saw... And that you are aware of the ramifications and the repacutions and the revenge of it all... I KNOW!!! You were the chosen one! Totally... Effin... Rulz!! ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/10/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/09/2005 Totally Buzzy... Can Not... Blog... Must... Do... Work... Uggh... So I hope this will keep you ocupado... Ha Ha... I once saw this joyous enlightenment on like some PBS Station after a long lavish late nite into an early elegant morning thing and while I began My Minimizing Hangover Procedure No. 8 //two cheese samiches on rye with garlic salt// Regimen... I saw this amazement of beauty and heard a choir of possibility.... it is called Animusic ... and I was tremedously mesmerized and ah... reborn ...really... I totally was... I WAS... But now I am better... wow... those samiches really worked... wink! uggh! Next on The Actors Studio... The General Lee ... P.S. After yesterdays horror show, the horror show was still playing out. Even the day after the blizzardizzel was totally better that the day after this horror show.. I was even too scared to take any pics.. even the main roads were still covered with ice and snow... still... at like 10 am too ...uggh!!! ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/09/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/08/2005 Signs Of The Apocalypse ::'The Day After Tomorrow'... It Can Totally Happen!!! The Day After Tomorrow can really totally happen because it happened to me in like 45 minutes today.. ::The Story:: In the morning it was warm and just raining and so I wore my blue jacket with the super huge hood... //fstfrwd// and after driving west for awhile, it started to get really cold and then began to sleet, which I never really had driven thru before and then it began to sleet more and more and then it grew darker out... So I decided to turn around and drove east and after a few minutes it began to get lighter and turned to all rain...I thought that I out drove it and patted myself on the back for making the right decision...//fstfrwd// As I was getting close to home, I had to turn north and just when I did, it got really windy and cold again and then the sleet returned and then it grew darker again and then it was so windy that the sleet was just blowin' sideways and I was driving on a road that cuts thru a wooded area and then all of a sudden... the snow just began to dash out from behind the trees across the road like there was some giant snowblower in the woods shooting the white stuff accross the street... it even began to stick to everything... buildings, trees, sidewalks, grass, windshields ... the road even went from black to white in like a quarter of a mile... everything began to freeze... I totally have never seen anything like it and of course the worse part was that I totally had to... yadda yadda yadda... so then I finally made it home. ::Sidenotes:: So when it first began to sleet I began to take pics... I had an inkling that this may be interesting because I knew it was gonna snow eventually, but it totally started like 6 hours early... so I decided to document the whole experience and I got it all from the first sleet to the final dash home... unfortunately... I took the pics towards my back window and the big hooded jacket blocked every pic so I picked the best of the worst.. so here we go... It was just starting to sleet... And then the sleating became snowing ... And the it started to stick ... like a magnet I even saw an accident ...stupid hood covered up the busted van and the two cop cars ;-( I finally drove down my street where I skidded the length of the property when I tried to turn into the driveway... Pics are horrible I know... sorry :-( ::Conclusion:: When I finally pushed my windthrashed door open and climbed out my car //que background choir singing ominus lyrics// ... I mustered a look up the street and then in amazement I looked down the street ... It was unbelievable... The wind was totally whippin'... Everything was in like a white fog... You could see no individual snowflakes... Super cold air made my fingers stiff... I was like half disorintated... and it was only a few minutes... I totally mad dashed thru my front door... when I looked back to the outside and it was like as if it was at night but instead of everything being black it was all white... I could not make out a single object that was not within arms length... totally crazy... It was so worse than the blizzardizzel... for sure! In a word... supercoldairfromtheupperpartofthetroposphere... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/08/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/07/2005 Signs Of The Apocalypse :: STARBUCKS COFFEE... Liqueur!!! I just totally found out about this and I had no idea whatsoeva that STARBUCKS COFFEE Liqueur was even on the drawing board let alone ready to be consumed... I'm totally lossin' it !!! But come to think of it... it makes sense though... I guess when ya got the whole nation addicted to CAFFEINE... //scratches index finger repeatedly on chin and gazes upward into empty space// ...what would be the next logical step??? //Snaps finger// That's right... BOOZEINE !!! I guess now we'll hear about all the crazy clever concocting cocktail combinations that will get ya 'effed up real quickfast... just like The Red Bull N' Vodka Urban Legend... Now... the funniest part about this whole STARBUCKS COFFEE Liqueur thing is... Ya can't even buy it at STARBUCKS... now that's funny!!! In a word... freshmorninbuzz... ahhhhhhhhh-hic! ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/07/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/06/2005 Cowabunga Mate...And Mate... And Mate... Oh And You Too... Now... I am sure that by now you have all seen the image and read the article... But man... it looks like it breaks not only the laws of physics but of time and space as well... it looks so fake and unbelievable... I thought it would look more like this! In a word... fourtysurferssurfingfourtyfootsurfboard! ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/06/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/05/2005 I Am Jack's Imaginary Tiger Friend... An amazing commentary about my most favorite subject... here... In a word... veddyveddyintresting... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/05/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/04/2005 Welcome Back, Martha!!! Welcome Back, Martha!!! Welcome back, your dreams were your ticket out... Welcome back, to that same old place that you laughed about. Well the names have not changed since you hung around, All those dreams have remained and they're still around. Who'd have thought they'd jail ya (Who'd have thought they'd jail ya) We are here when ya need us (Here when ya need us ) Yeah... we tease her a lot cause we've got her on the spot, welcome back, Welcome back... welcome back... welcome back. Uggh... now five months of house arrest... Who'd she kill anyway?... really... no one... well... who'd she shoot?... really... no one... well who'd she stab?... sell drugs to?... who'd she molest?... tax evasion?... sex video?... really no one... well ... well who'd she back over with her car in the Hamptons?... no one!... then why?...oh really... that's why!?! Well... umm... that seems a bit much don't ya think.... In a word... gardenhandglovesinsteadofheavyhandcuffs...peace! Rock n' Rule Martha ... Rock n' Rule ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/04/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/03/2005 Things I Would Love To Hear/Overhear At A Bar... I would love to hear/overhear in a crowded bar... I'll bring us through this... As always... I'll carry you... Kicking and screaming... And in the end... you'll thank me... My friend Tyler rulez so much... so much that I'm gonna write a book... //Enters Inspiroti// It's called 'Things Overheard At The End Of The Bar'... //Exits Inspiroti// Because ya know... if ya pay attention in a bar... you overhear the cah-raziest things.... In a word... thursday...c-ya... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/03/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/02/2005 Uggh... The Grossest Thing Happened To Me Today... And so... eewwwww... Since I have not been working these past few days I have no reason to leave my pad... so the only thing I have to look forward to is myalldaylongdrinkingof... coffee... //Flazback// Before we got the snow on Monday I bought extra coffee... extra Equal... and extra... //pause for effect// ... Half and Half... Shop and Stop did not have any quarts so I bought two pints of Half and Half... //roulf//... //End Flazback// Soooo today I finish the last of the old quarts of Half and Half and so I open one of the new pints of Half and Half.... And as I poured it into ma mug... I saw some globs come out but I thought they were like just bubbles... so I add ma coffee and... I notice like tiny iceburgs floating in my coffee... I was like 'rruh rro'... Sooo... I went to smell it... And ya know sometimes when ya drink out of a can of soda and sometimes ya use a straw and sometimes ya spill it because you are using the straw but tip the can as if there was no straw... ...well... I was suppose to smell it right?!?... ...and not drink it right?!?... So I slowly begin to bring it up to my mouth/nose... Wondering all the while... What could of happend to it... I just bought it... //getting closer to my mouth/nose// It could be frozen chunks... But then everything else would frozen too... //then it got super close to my mouth/nose// And that is when it happened... Suddenly!!! I realized... ... and I was like... Oh My Gawd... I almost drank the skank!!!! Whew! Close one!!! Ughh! So I smelled it and... it did not smell bad... but it did not smell right.... Uggh... So I poured it down the sink.. and the chunks... they were like about the size of chocolate chips ya find in Chips Ahoy cookies and they started... uggh... they started to clog up the drain... and the white liquid flem began to pool in the middle of the sink... I ran the water to get it down, but the chunks... they were standing their ground... finally I took a fork //which I will never use again// and unclog the chunks and washed them down along with all the white flem...eewwwww... ...Coffee mug goes into the dishwasher... So I grabbed the other pint of Half and Half out of the frigidare... wishing and wishing and wishing that it was not 'evil'... because that was the last... The Last of the Half and Half... So I pour a little coffee into a new coffee mug and some equal//in retrospect... not smart// and then added the Half and Half.. and this time... the chunks... they were... they were bigger... So I turned super quick and grabbed yet another sacrificial fork and I began to pour into the sink.. the chunks were like the size of corn flakes... and I jammed them down into the drain like my life depended on it.... all the while 'Horror Movie Soundtrack' echoed in my head... uggh... And yet another coffee mug goes into the dishwasher... Whew... so all I had left was a quart of 2% Milk and I prayed that the the 'evilness' did not spread... So I made... yet again... another mug and began to pour... surprisingly... silky smooth whiteness.... thank goodness... So I used it... it was not the same as Half and Half... but I used it any way... //Enter Afterparty// And sure... it wasn't the grossest thing EVER but it was the grossest thing that happened to me today... and hey... I never even went outside... not even once... not even to get the mail... laziness so rulez!!! //wispers// Did ya really think that I drank the skank?!? //ends wisper// Listen... just because I am good looking does not mean that I am a moron!!! Sheesh! In a word... soy... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/02/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

3/01/2005 Pretty... Pretty once... Pretty twice... Pretty three times... Hey... that is pretty nice... //wellanyway// Man... I would just love to throw a big party in a really huge old house with peeling paint and hardly any furniture with really bright lighting among all my closest peeps crammed together shoulder to shoulder and these guys jammin' in the background... And yes... I realize that these guys have not really had anything new lately... Glen Phillips... I remember... did a few tunes with John Mayer //which b.t.w....nice site John!!!// but not sure when that happened... And I guess the rest of the band is in a band called Lapdog..... the main site for Toad the Wet Sprocket is totally bare bones so info is more than scarce... I just downloaded 'P.S. :A Toad Retrospective' which was released like 6 years ago but... it brought back such great fun excellent memories... I HAD TOO!!! Just so ya know... the above house party... is not a wish... it is a memory... Things were just so much better back then... fun and kool and awesome and exciting... back then... ... I felt like... there wasn't anything I couldn't do.... //sighs... with inner monologue// ... I would do anything... everything... to feel that way again... In a word... regretsinthethousands...... Uggh... man... I need to pull myself together //enters comfort// ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 3/01/2005 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...