1/30/2006 Bright Shine... Haze City... Headin' Southbound... ... and it was so totally warm out... again... ... the city wuz heavy in haze... ... but I drove the whole way... ... windows rolled down... ... jacket off... ... sleeves roll up... ... wind ah-whippin'... ... the sun shinin' in my face... ... mah iTrip... ah-crankin'... ... jammin' all the way to Pearl Jam... ...ahhh... In a word... kindasadimhome... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/30/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/29/2006 Bless You... When the first light of sun... Bless you... When the long day is done.. Bless you... In your smiles and your tears... Bless you... Through each day of your years... Bless you... In a word... isoloveyoumymonkey... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/29/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/26/2006 The Greatest Days Ahead... Headin' Northbound... ... the everlearn will be on bye-aitus for a few days while I participate in something awesome... I am lucky... and blest... In a word...sototallyblest... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/26/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/23/2006 The Gloomiest Day... Evah... Even that stank did not even bother to stink on this gloomiest day... ...and ya'd think it'd stink real bad... but it it did not even smell... not even one whiff... not even once at all... So lets start out by listin' all the things I witnessed before 9:30 am precceding the almighty exam... which is usually like still an hour before I even attempt to get out of bed... It was totally rainin' as I walk into S'vez to get mah coffee way too early than I usually do and as I walk in... suddenly... loudly... I hear this gigantik sneeze... unmuffled... and with my echo-location I noticed that it occured in the general direction of the coffee center... as I approach closer I witness NINE grossed out peeps and ONE lady sniffling the snotizzel back into its chamber soooo... I took the coffee pot most furthest from her and super opposite of her general direction as the others stood snot stunned... so super gross... and yes I needed the caffine that badly... hello almighty exam... So I only had a twenty on me and I really hate paying for small stuff with big bills so I figur'd I'll get a can of coffee and... D'oh... they were out... //prolly cuz a cup o' coffee now cost $1.68//... so I figur'd I'll get some Equal.. I can always use it and I'll be set... so as I get on line I find a five in my pocket... uggh... big deal... I'll just have extra Equal... Soooo... I was at register 'A' with my Equal and my coffee... and this dude was at register 'B' with his danish-ish and his coffee... so my change came to like 40 cents and his change came to... wait for it... $93.41... yup... the dude paid for coffee and a danish with a C-Note... I KNOW!... Soooo... I am driving thinking of all the things I needed to remember and that's when it occur'd to me... I know what I should have bought at S'vez to offset my twenty-dollah-dilema... ah calculator... 'cuz I just 'membered that I forgot mine and I need to use one in like 15 friggin' minutes... uggh... and I thought this is too perfect... I'll take the exam and if I fail I'll just say that I forgot my calculator... but then they would ask if I asked for one or to borrow one... so I promised mahself that if I see a place between now and the two final miles of my trek to my destination I'd stop... so up pops a S'vez... so I super screeched in and low and behold they have a calculator with batteries included... hurrah... so I get back into my car and I open the calculator and notice that the battery compartment is so totally seal'd with the worlds most smallest screw..... uggh... now I am screwed... but I did notice some solar panel-ish thingz on the front... so I cloze'd my eyes and I pressed 'ON'... and lo and behold... it friggin' worked... ... so then back on the rain slick'd road... I see this lady in 'beemer' driving with a white poodle on her lap... and I thought to mahself... she is gonna cauze an accident... and then lo and behold... I see a bunch of peeps... including a public bus... makin' the old quick change/braidin' the lanes... everyone was swervin' in and out tryin'' to avoid... yes you guess'd it... whitepoodelbeemerdriveinlady... who apparently was tryin' to make a left in a regular lane when clearly a turning lane was provided... she was still tryin' to make the turn even as I passed by... and I shook my head in un-approvalment... ... this is why I sleep-in... In a word...gloomisbloom... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/23/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/12/2006 Green Eggs And... Ummm... Glowing Ham... Yikes... And have ya seen this! That's right... frekin' glowing pigs... it has something to do with stem cell research in Taiwan... and I bet the glowin' frankinfish are fumin'... Not to mention the green puppy... but he doesn't glow... he's just regular freaky... wasup lil' Wasabi...hey... ...and in domestic news... It was so super nice out today... warmy warm... peeps totally speedin'... tons of birds everywhere... not a cloud in the sky... maybe even //dare I say// a lil' bit hazy... how long wuz i asleep... what month is it... yikes... I drove around all day without a jacket... and with a short sleeve shirt on... I KNOW... ahhh... I even drove by the Insane Asylum... which oddly smelled like cedar... And this is so not like it was this time-ish last year... Brrrr... These daze are meant to be cherished... In a word...dazed... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/12/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/11/2006 iPod Hearts RedWire DLX...Whoa I Gottah Have It... Yeah so lets get right to it shall we... before I hyperventrilicate ... Jeans giant Levi's is hoping to woo fashionistas and music aficionados alike with its new iPod-compatible RedWire DLX jeans, due out this fall. With a joystick remote control built into the watch pocket, the new jeans will allow wearers to play, pause, track forward or back and adjust the volume on their iPods without having to take them out of their pockets. WHOA!... I mean... WOW!... I can barely believe it... whew... check out the amazin' rest HERE! Totally unbelievable... and eventhough I've been waiting for my Personal Jet Pack my whole life I'll totally accept this in the DREAM COME TRUE category as an equal substitution... Cah-Razy... And I guess the sequel to Clerks is well on it's way.... I knew they were thinking about it and talkin' 'bout it and I've heard rumours for like years but now they even gots a trailer and everythin'... I think it was originally going to be called 'The Passion Of The Clerks'... but now it think it is just goin' to be 'Clerks II'... and it will be either really really great or really terrible, which would also make it really really great... ohhh I can't frikin' wait... ...You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you... CLASSIC! If there is just one line half like that in the new one I'll super dig it... ... and in domestic news... ....I never left the house today... at all... it was foggy then rainy... never even seen one live human being in person... talked to no one face to face... I didn't even take advantage of stayin' home to my full benefit... dishes still uncleaned... desk still a massive fire hazard... Christmas cards still not sent and those in the know know that that is true... plus I woke up at like 1:25 pm... so I missed breakfast and nearly missed lunch... I was alone all day but not really all that lonely... my friend Tyler says that people do it everyday... they talk to themselves... they see themselves as they'd like to be... they don't have the courage you have... to just run with it... ummokay... In a word... jediorempire... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/11/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/10/2006 The Estimated Distance To The Horizon... Hush... Hush... Yeah So... If you follow the super steep road down into its infinity end... just to the left is the sparklin' shimmerin' spectaculah ocean... Evidently... there is a very specific formula to define the distance to the horizon... but I must have been seein' like at least 15-20 miles... iz dat possible? Well... it felt very possible as I free fell and coasted down the rollah coasterish road without using the breaks for like a mile and a half... it wuz wild... untill that stop sign... yadda yadda yadda... //flashback 3 hours before// Yeah so... after I gotz my mornin' coffee... while drivin'... I was listenin' to the radio//radioyousuckanyway// and I heard 'Hush Hush' by Deep Purple... and it was really a long time since I had really heard it... so I totally rock'd out... and then frikin' 25 minutes later I heard it... again... iz dat weird? ... and I totally rock'd out... both timez... //end flazback// And Then Later On ... I hear on my innernext radio some sort of shmash up with Greenday and Oasis... developing... but check it out here... In a word... onacleardayicansee4eva... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/10/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/02/2006 There Is No Spoon... This Year's Resolution is all about... Transformation... Spoons... Soap... Sith... Socrates... they all did it... and so can I... //enter inner monologue// ... barely alive... ... we can rebuild... ... we have the technology... ... we have the capability... ... better than before.... Better... Stronger... Faster... Whoa... future is like so totally bright... In a word... yesican... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/02/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...

1/01/2006 ...uggh... ...ummm... wuh... uggh... yeah... so last night... ...yadda yad ya... ... and the last thing that i really r'member is eating a couple xtra slices of my dirty jello pie... ... and then suddenly today... or is today the day after... allz i know i slept on the couch... or mahbee it was a real nice warm dog... ...ohh... my stomach hurts to even to think out loud... ...how ya doin' 2006... i hate ya already... /hic/... In a word... iwouldntchangeathang... ///posted by the often humiliated but never decaffeinated X @ 1/01/2006 0 Fresh Colorful Commentaries...